Road To Recovery - Recycling My Pain
Genesis 50:20
Romans 8:28
The Tapestry of Life

Principle #8 – Yielded To God

A Summary of R.E.C.O.V.E.R.Y

1. “Happy are those who know they are spiritually poor.”
The Lord’s Prayer - “Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name.”
Realize I'm NOT God! I admit I’m powerless to control my tendency to do the wrong thing and my life is unmanageable.

2. “Happy are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.”
The Lord’s Prayer - “Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name.”
Earnestly believe that God exists, that I matter to Him, and that He has the power to help me recover.

3. “Happy are the meek.”
The Lord’s Prayer - “Give us this day our daily bread.”
Consciously choose to commit all my life and will to Christ’s care and control.

4. “Happy are the pure in heart.”
The Lord’s Prayer - “Forgive us our debts.”
Openly examine and confess my faults to myself, to God, and to someone I trust.

5. “Happy are those whose desire is to do what God requires.”
The Lord’s Prayer - “May Your will be done, may Your kingdom come.”
Voluntarily submit to every change God wants to make in my life and humbly ask Him to remove my character defects.

6. “Happy are the merciful.” “Happy are the peacemakers.”
The Lord’s Prayer - “As we forgive others.”
Evaluate all my relationships. Offer amends to those who’ve hurt me and make amends for harm I’ve done to others except when to do so would harm them or others.

7. The maintenance step
The Lord’s Prayer - “Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.”
Reserve a daily time with God for a self-examination, bible reading, and prayer in order to know God and His will for my life and gain the power to do it.

The 8th Step of R.E.C.O.V.E.R.Y

Yield myself to God to be used to bring the Good News to others by both my example and my words.
"Happy are those who are persecuted because they do what God requires"
The Lord’s Prayer - “For Thine is the Kingdom, and the power, and the glory, forever. Amen”

Why God Allowed My Pain

• Volition
• Inspiration
• Reliance
• Ministry

Volition = He’s given me a free will

• Genesis 1: 27 “You were made in the image of God.”
• Deuteronomy 30:19 TLB “I am giving you the choice between God’s blessing or God’s curse.”

Inspiration = Motivation - To get my attention

• Proverbs 20:30 GNB “Sometimes it takes a painful situation to make us change our ways.”
• We don’t change when we see the light but when we feel the heat.
• II Corinthians 7:9 TLB “I am glad … not because it hurt you but because the pain turned you to God …”

Reliance = To teach me to depend on Him

• II Corinthians 1:8–10 TLB “We were crushed and overwhelmed … and saw how powerless we were to help ourselves; but that was good, for then we put everything into the hands of God who alone could save us .. and He did help us!”
• You don’t know that God is all you need until God’s all you got.
• Psalm 119:71 TLB “ … it was the best thing that could have happened to me, for it taught me to pay attention to your laws!”
• The truth is, some things we only learn through pain.

To give me a ministry to others

• II Corinthians 1:4 TLB “Why does God do this? So that when others are troubled, needing our sympathy and encouragement, we can pass on to them the same help and comfort God has given us.”
• God never wastes a hurt.

How To Use My Pain - Three methods:

1. Testimony
2. Intervention
3. Proclamation

Testimony
I Peter 3:15 “Always be prepared to give an account to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect.”

Intervention
Galatians 6:1–2 TLB “If someone is overcome by some sin … humbly help him back onto the right path, remembering that next time it might be you who is in the wrong. Share each other’s troubles and problems, and so obey our Lord’s commands.”

Proclamation
John 20:21 “ Peace be to you. As the Father has sent me, so I send you.”
Mark 16:15 “ Go into all the world and preach the gospel to all creation.”

How To Share - Three suggestions:

1. Be humble
2. Be real
3. Don’t lecture

Acts 20:24 TLB “But life is worth nothing unless I use it for doing the work assigned me by the Lord Jesus … the work of telling others the Good News about God’s mighty kindness and love.”

I have seen how they acted but I will heal them, I will lead them and help them and I will comfort those who mourn. I offer peace to all near and far. Isaiah 57:18

Road To Recovery - Maintaining Momentum
Mark 5:1-20
A radical beginning!

Principle #7 – Avoiding Relapse

Caution
The Doorway to the Kingdom - Oswald Chambers “My Utmost For His Highest”

• Matthew 5:3 “Blessed are the poor in spirit …”
• Beware of thinking of our Lord as only a teacher.
• He came to make me what He teaches I should be.
• The Beatitudes produce a sense of despair in the natural man.
• The knowledge of our own poverty is what brings us to the proper place where Jesus Christ accomplishes His work.

Watch and pray, lest you enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.
Mark 14:38

Maintain your R.E.C.O.V.E.R.Y
Relapses happen in a very predictable pattern.

• 1st is complacency.
• 2nd is confusion.
• 3rd then you go to compromise.
• 4th the catastrophe

Don't give up!

• You need to understand that the collapse is not the relapse.
• The catastrophe is simply the result of the pattern that happened.

What Can Cause a Relapse?

• Reverting to willpower.
• Galatians 3:3 “How can you be so foolish? You began by God’s spirit, do you now want to finish on your own power?”

Steps to R.E.C.O.V.E.R.Y

• 1. Realize I'm NOT God! I admit I’m powerless to control my tendency to do the wrong thing and my life is unmanageable.
• 2. Earnestly believe that God exists, that I matter to Him, and that He has the power to help me recover.
  
• 3. Consciously choose to commit all my life and will to Christ’s care and control.

Not by might, nor by power, but by My spirit says the Lord.
Zechariah 4:6

• Ignoring one of the steps.
  • We get in a hurry or we try to skip difficult steps:
• 4. Openly examine and confess my faults to myself, to God, and to someone I trust.
• 5. Voluntarily submit to every change God wants to make in my life and humbly ask Him to remove my character defects.
• 6. Evaluate all my relationships. Offer amends to those who’ve hurt me and make amends for harm I’ve done to others except when to do so would harm them or others.
• Galatians 3:3 “You were doing so well. Who made you stop obeying the truth.”
• Trying to recover without support.
  • “I’ll listen to these sermons, I’m not going to go to counseling, I’m not going to go to Celebrate Recovery, I’m not going to go to small group”
• Ecclesiastes 4:7 “Two are better off than one because if one of them falls down, the other can help him up. But if someone is alone and falls it’s too bad because there’s nobody there to listen and lift him up or help him.”
  • You can’t lick this problem alone. If you could have you would have. But you can’t so you won’t.
• Hebrews 10:25 “Let us not give up the habit of meeting together.”
  • You can see short-term gains in your life without involving other people if you’ll do these steps.
  • But you cannot do long-term recovery without relationships.
  • The root of your problem is relational.
• We become prideful.
• Proverbs 16:18 “Pride goes before destruction.”
  • You need to stay humble or you’ll stumble.
• I Corinthians 10:12 “So if you think you’re standing watch out that you do not fall.”
  • The greatest weakness

How Do I Prevent a Relapse?

• Maintenance

The Seventh Step to R.E.C.O.V.E.R.Y

• Principle 7 – Reserve a daily time with God for a self-examination, bible reading, and prayer in order to know God and His will for my life and gain the power to do it.
• Mark 14:38 “Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation, for the Spirit is willing but the body is weak.”

Three Safeguards

• Evaluation
• Meditation
• Prayer

Evaluation

• II Corinthians 13:5 “Check up on yourselves”
• Lamentations 3:40 “Let us examine ourselves and let us repent.

What To Evaluate?

Physical:

• You ask the question, “What is my body telling me?”

Emotional:

• What am I feeling right now?
• You do a “heart check.”
  • H - Am I hurting?
  • E - Am I exhausted?
  • A - Am I angry?
  • R - Do I resent anybody?
  • T - Am I tense? anxious? fearful?

Relational:

• Am I at peace with everyone?

Spiritual:

• Am I relying on God?

Each one should test his own action. Then he can take pride in himself without comparing himself to somebody else.
Galatians 6:4

When do I do my Evaluation?

• Spot check inventory.
• Daily review.
• Annual checkup.

Three Safeguards

• Evaluation
• Meditation
  • Slowing down long enough to hear God.
  • Psalm 1:1–3 “Happy are those who are always meditating on God’s laws and thinking about ways to follow Him closely. They are like trees on a river that do not dry up, they succeed in everything they do.”
• Prayer
  • Prayer can do whatever God can do.
  • The Lord’s Prayer model - This is not what you should pray, this is how you should pray.
    • All of the recovery steps are covered in this prayer

I have seen how they acted but I will heal them, I will lead them and help them and I will comfort those who mourn. I offer peace to all near and far.
Isaiah 57:18

Road To Recovery - Repairing Relationships
Ephesians 4:31-32

Principle #6 – Amends
Matthew 5:7,9
"Happy are the merciful"
"Happy are the peacemakers"

Steps to R.E.C.O.V.E.R.Y

1. Realize I'm NOT God! I admit I’m powerless to control my tendency to do the wrong thing and my life is unmanageable.
2. Earnestly believe that God exists, that I matter to Him, and that He has the power to help me recover.
3. Consciously choose to commit all my life and will to Christ’s care and control.
4. Openly examine and confess my faults to myself, to God, and to someone I trust.
5. Voluntarily submit to every change God wants to make in my life and humbly ask Him to remove my character defects.

The Sixth Step to R.E.C.O.V.E.R.Y

• Principle 6 – Evaluate all my relationships. Offer amends to those who’ve hurt me and make amends for harm I’ve done to others except when to do so would harm them or others.
• Ephesians 4:31-32 “Get rid of all bitterness, rage, and anger … along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”
• Matthew 5:7,9 “Blessed are the merciful, For they shall obtain mercy.” “Blessed are the peacemakers, For they shall be called sons of God.”

Two parts to it

• First, forgive those that have hurt me
• Second, make amends to those I’ve hurt.

Forgive Those Who’ve Hurt Me

Why?

• Because God has forgiven you.
  • Colossians 3:13 TLB “Never hold grudges. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.”
• Luke 7:47-48 “Therefore I say to you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven, for she loved much. But to whom little is forgiven, the same loves little.” 48Then He said to her, “Your sins are forgiven.”
  • You will never have to forgive anybody else more than God has already forgiven you.
  • When you have a hard time forgiving other people it’s usually because you don’t feel forgiven.
• You need to realize if God’s forgiven me then I need to forgive other people. Believe!
  • Because resentment doesn’t work.
    • Job 5:2 NKJ For wrath kills a foolish man, And envy slays a simple one.”
    • GNB “To worry yourself to death with resentment would be a foolish, senseless thing to do.”
    • Ecclesiastes 6:9(paraphrased) “It’s foolish to harbor a grudge.”
    • Job 18:4 GNB “You are only hurting yourself with your anger!”
    • It cannot change the past, cannot correct the problem, it doesn’t change the person, it doesn’t even hurt that person, it only hurts you.
    • Job 21:23–25 “Some men stay healthy till the day they die … others have no happiness at all; they live and die with bitter hearts.”
• Research - the two greatest causes of the physical problems in your life are guilt and resentment.
  • It’s not so much what you eat, it’s what eats you that matters.
• Because I need forgiveness in the future.
  • Mark 11:25 TLB “When you are praying, first forgive anyone you are holding a grudge against, so that your Father in heaven will forgive you your sins too.”
  • We cannot receive what we are unwilling to give.
    • Matthew 6:12 “Forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors.”
• Matthew 6:37 “Judge not, and you shall not be judged. Condemn not, and you shall not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. 38Give, and it will be given to you: good measure, pressed down, shaken together, and running over will be put into your bosom. For with the same measure that you use, it will be measured back to you.”

Forgive Those Who’ve Hurt Me

How?

• Reveal my hurt
  • Admit it. Let it out. Face it. Be honest
  • You can’t get over hurt until you admit it hurt
  • Admit it and put it down on paper
• Options when it comes to hurt
  • You can repress it
  • You can suppress it
  • Or you can confess it
    • There is no closure without disclosure
  • You release the offender. By forgiving them.
    • You don’t wait for them to ask for forgiveness.
      • Why? Because God has forgiven you and you’re going to need forgiveness in the future and resentment doesn’t work, it just makes you miserable.
• How often?
  • Matthew 18:22 “Jesus answered, ‘Not seven times but seventy times seven times.’”
• How do you know when you have released an offender fully?
  • You can think about them and it doesn’t hurt anymore.
  • You can pray for God’s blessing on their life.
  • You can begin to look at understanding their hurt, rather than focusing on how they hurt you, because hurt people, hurt people.
• In releasing an offender it is not always possible, it is not even always advisable, for you to go back to somebody who’s hurt you.
  • Use the empty-chair & un –mailed letter techniques
• Replace my hurt with God’s peace.
  • Colossians 3:15 “And let the peace of God rule in your hearts.”
  • Romans 12:19 “Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, “Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,” says the Lord.”
• The fact is relationships can tear your heart into pieces.
  • But God can glue those pieces back together and surround it and cover it with His peace over your pieces.
    • You must release those who hurt you so God can do some repair in your heart.

Make amends with those I’ve hurt

Why?

• Because unresolved relationships are the root of your problem and they prevent recovery from happening.

Pursue peace with all people, and holiness, without which no one will see the Lord: looking carefully lest anyone fall short of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up cause trouble, and by this many become defiled” Hebrews 12:14-15

How?

• You make a list of those I’ve harmed and what I did.
  • Can’t think of anybody?
  • Is there anyone I owe a debt to that I haven’t repaid? -- Is there anyone I’ve broken a promise to? -- Is there anyone I’m guilty of over controlling? A spouse? A kid? A brother? An employee? Friend? -- Is there anyone I’m overly possessive of? -- Is there anyone I’m hypercritical of? -- Have I been verbally abusive to anybody? -- Or physically abusive? -- Or emotionally abusive? -- Is there anyone I have not appreciated or not paid attention to or forgotten an anniversary? -- Is there anyone I’ve been unfaithful to? Or have I lied to anyone?
• Think how I’d like someone to make amends to me.
  • Luke 6:31 “Do to others as you’d have them do to you.”
• There are three issues you need to look at:
  • Time
    • Ecclesiastes 8:6: “There’s a right time and right way to do everything.”
  • Attitude.
    • Ephesians 4:15 “Speak the truth in a spirit of love.”
    • Make restitution where possible. - Have nothing to hide. That gives you freedom and confidence.
    • Luke 19: 8-9 – Zacchaeus
    • The more serious your offense, the less likely you’re going to be able to make restitution.
  • Is it appropriate?
    • Proverbs says, “Thoughtless words can wound as deeply as any sword but wisely spoken words can heal.”
• Remember the qualifier on this step is “except when to do so would harm them or others.”
  • Romans 12:18: “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”
• Refocus my life.
  • Job 11: “Put your heart right, reach out to God, then face the world again, firm and courageous, then all your troubles will fade from your memory, like floods that are past and remembered no more.”
• Three steps to refocusing your life:
  1. Put your heart right. Release and forgive.
  2. Reach out to God.
  3. Face the world again.

I have seen how they acted but I will heal them, I will lead them and help them and I will comfort those who mourn. I offer peace to all near and far. Isaiah 57:18

Road To Recovery - Making Changes
Acts 9
Romans 12:1-2

Principle #1 – Reality
Principle #2 – Hope
Principle #3 – Choice
Principle #4 – Action
Principle #5 – Transformation

• Principle 1 - Realize I'm NOT God!
• I admit that I am powerless to control my tendency to do the wrong thing and my life is unmanageable.
• Matthew 6:3 “Blessed are the poor in spirit, For theirs is the kingdom of heaven.”
  • "Happy are those who know they are spiritually poor"

The Second Step to R.E.C.O.V.E.R.Y

• Principle 2 – Earnestly believe that God exists, that I matter to him, and that he has the power to help me recover.
• Hebrews 11:6 “But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.”
• Matthew 5:4 “Happy are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted

The Third Step to R.E.C.O.V.E.R.Y

• Principle 3 – Consciously choose to commit all my life and will to Christ’s care and control.
• Matthew 11:28 “Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.”
• Matthew 5:5 “Happy are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.”

The Fourth Step to R.E.C.O.V.E.R.Y

• Principle 4 – Openly examine and confess my faults to God, to myself, and to someone I trust.
• Psalm 32:1-2 “Blessed is he whose transgression is forgiven, Whose sin is covered. 2 Blessed is the man to whom the LORD does not impute iniquity, And in whose spirit there is no deceit.”
• Matthew 5:5 “Happy are the pure in heart.”

The Fifth Step to R.E.C.O.V.E.R.Y

• Principle 5 – Voluntarily submit to every change God wants to make in my life and humbly ask Him to remove my character defects.
• Romans 12:1-2 GNB “Offer yourselves as a living sacrifice to God, dedicated to his service and pleasing to him … and let God transform you inwardly by a complete change of your mind.”
• Matthew 5:6 “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be filled.”

Three Questions

1. Where do my character defects come from?
2. Why is it so hard to get rid of them?
3. How do I cooperate with God’s change process in this step and see God change the hurts, the habits, and the hang-ups that have been messing up my life?

Where do the defects come from!

• Nature ~ Nurture ~ Need
  • A biological source
  • A sociological source
  • A theological source
• My chromosomes
• My circumstances
• My choices

Habits

• Character is simply long habit continued. -- Plutarch
• Habits are cobwebs at first, then become cables.
• The chains of habit are too weak to be felt until they are too strong to be broken. --- Samuel Johnson (1709–1784)
• The second half of a man's life is made up of the habits he acquired during the first half. --- Fyodor Mikhaylovich Dostoyevski (1821–1881)
• The strength of a man's virtue should not be measured by his special exertions, but by his habitual acts. --- Blaise Pascal (1623–1662)

Why Is It So Hard To Change The Defects In My Life?

1. Because I’ve had them so long.

• You didn’t get them overnight.
  • We are creatures of habit. Old cranks have practiced all their lives, just as old saints have likewise practiced all their lives. --- John Powell
  • We first make our habits, and then our habits make us. --- John Dryden
• Many of the habits, the patterns, you have you developed in childhood, and they may not be comfortable and they may even be self-defeating, but at least they are familiar.

2. Identity

• 
  We confuse our identity with the defects.
  • We say, “That’s just the way I am.”
• Complete this sentence (in your mind) “It’s just like me to be ___________________”
• Sow an act and you reap a habit. Sow a habit and you reap a character. Sow a character and you reap a destiny. --- Samuel Smiles (1812–1904)
• Becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

3. Payoff

• It may mask my pain.
• It may give me an excuse to fail.
• It may allow me to compensate for guilt in my life.
• It may get me attention.
• My defect may allow me to control other people.
• Any time a negative behavior is repeated in you, yourself, your kids, anybody, even though it’s self-destructive, there’s always a payoff.

4. Satan discourages me

• I Peter 5:8-9 “Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour. Resist him, steadfast in the faith, knowing that the same sufferings are experienced by your brotherhood in the world.”
  • The Accuser
  • John 8:44 “…When he speaks a lie, he speaks from his own resources, for he is a liar and the father of it.”
• John 8:31-32 “…“If you abide in My word, you are My disciples indeed. And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.”

How Do I Cooperate With God’s Change Process In My Life?

• Romans 12:2 “Be transformed by the renewing of your mind.”
  • Your thoughts are your auto-pilot in life.
  • If you want to change your life you’ve got to change the way you think.
• Your thoughts determine your feelings, your feelings determine your actions.
  • James 1:13-15
• A habit cannot be tossed out the window; it must be coaxed down the stairs a step at a time! --- Mark Twain
  • I Timothy 4:7-8 “On the other hand, discipline yourself for the purpose of godliness; for bodily discipline is only of little profit, but godliness is profitable for all things, since it holds promise for the present life and also for the life to come.”

God who began the good work with you will keep right on helping you grow in His grace until His task within you is finally finished.
- Philippians 1:6

How Do I Cooperate With God?

1. Focus on changing one thing at a time.

• Proverbs 17:24 “An intelligent person aims at wise action, but a fool starts off in many directions.”
• You must be specific.
• II Peter 1:5-8 = process

2. Focus on victory one day at a time.

• Matthew 6:11 “Give us this day our daily bread”
• Matthew 6:34 “Don’t worry about tomorrow, each day has enough troubles of its own.”

3. Focus on God’s power not willpower

• Jeremiah 12:23 TLB “Can a leopard take away his spots? Nor can you who are used to doing evil now start being good.”
• Philippians 4:13 JB “I can master anything with the help of Christ who gives me strength.”

4. Focus on what I want, not what I don’t want.

• Philippians 4:8 TLB “Fix your thought on what is true and good and right. Think about things that are pure … Think about all you can praise God for and be glad about …”
  • Whatever you focus on is what you move toward.
  • Whatever you focus on is what dominates your life.
• You don’t resist temptation. Resist the tempter!
• Just turn the mental channel of your mind.
  • This is the power of affirming the Word of God.
  • There are over 7,000 promises in the Bible.

5. Focus on doing good, not feeling good.

• Galatians 5:16 JB “If you are guided by the Spirit you will be in no danger of yielding to self-indulgence.”
• If you do the right thing, your feelings will eventually catch up with you.
• If you wait until you feel like changing, you’ll never change.
  • The devil will make sure you’ll never feel like it.
  • It’s always easier to act your way into a feeling than to feel your way into an action.
  • AA uses the phrase “Fake it until you make it.”

6. Focus on people who help me, not hinder me in making the positive changes I want to make in my life.

• Proverbs 27:1 NCV “As iron sharpens iron, so people can improve each other.”
• I Corinthians 15:33 “Do not be deceived: “Evil company corrupts good habits.”
  • If you don’t want to get stung, you stay away from the bees.
• Ecclesiastes 4:7 “Two are better than one and a threefold cord is not easily broken.”
  • You can’t recover on your own. You must be in a group, in a relationship.
• Proverbs 27:17 “As iron sharpens iron, so people can improve each other.”

7. Focus on progress, not perfection.

• Philippians 1:6 “God who began the good work within you will keep right on helping you grow in his grace until his task with you is finally finished.”

“I have seen how they acted but I will heal them, I will lead them and help them and I will comfort those who mourn. I offer peace to all near and far.”
Isaiah 57:18

Road To Recovery - Coming Clean
John 8:2-11
John 3:14-15

Principle #1 – Reality
Principle #2 – Hope
Principle #3 – Choice
Principle #4 – Action

• Principle 1 - Realize I'm NOT God!
• I admit that I am powerless to control my tendency to do the wrong thing and my life is unmanageable.
• Matthew 6:3 “Blessed are the poor in spirit, For theirs is the kingdom of heaven.”
  • "Happy are those who know they are spiritually poor"

The Second Step to R.E.C.O.V.E.R.Y

• Principle 2 – Earnestly believe that God exists, that I matter to him, and that he has the power to help me recover.
• Hebrews 11:6 “But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.”
• Matthew 5:4 “Happy are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted

The Third Step to R.E.C.O.V.E.R.Y

• Principle 3 – Consciously choose to commit all my life and will to Christ’s care and control.
• Matthew 11:28 “Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.”
• Matthew 5:5 “Happy are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.”

The Fourth Step to R.E.C.O.V.E.R.Y

• Principle 4 – Openly examine and confess my faults to God, to myself, and to someone I trust.
• Psalm 32:1-2 “Blessed is he whose transgression is forgiven, Whose sin is covered. 2 Blessed is the man to whom the LORD does not impute iniquity, And in whose spirit there is no deceit.”
• Matthew 5:5 “Happy are the pure in heart.”

The reason for this step!

1. None of us is faultless.

• Romans 3:23 “For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God”
• As a result we carry guilt around—sometimes consciously, but most of the time unconsciously.
  • Many or our actions are a result caused by unconscious guilt.
  • We may deny the guilt. We may repress the guilt. We may blame other people for our guilt. We may excuse our guilt. We may rationalize our guilt.
  • But we still feel the effects of it.

2. We must let go of guilt.

• Rationalizing is telling myself in my mind that it’s OK when I know in my heart it was wrong.
• Psalm 32:1-2 “What happiness for those whose guilt has been forgiven. What relief for those who have confessed their sins and God has cleared their record.”

3. Guilt destroys my confidence

• Exposure – You are always worried.
• Rejection – What if somebody find out?
• Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s note
  • Sent an anonymous note to five prominent men and it simply said this: “All is found out, flee at once.”
  • Within twenty-four hours all five men had left the country.

4. Guilt damages my relationships

• To respond to people in wrong ways:
  • Guilt can make me impatient with other people.
  • Guilt can cause me to overreact in anger.
  • Guilt can cause you to spoil people, indulge people.
  • Guilt can cause you to avoid commitment in relationship.

5. Guilt keeps me stuck in the past

• Like driving and always looking in the rearview mirror.
  • You’re going to end up crashing if you do that.
  • It gives perspective but you don’t constantly look at it.
  • If you’re always looking at a rearview mirror you never get ahead.
  • It makes you sick!
• Psychiatrists say that probably 70% of the people in the hospital could leave today if they knew how to resolve their guilt.
• When I swallow my guilt my stomach keeps score.
• If I don’t talk it out to God and to others I take it out on myself.

“You will never succeed in life if you try to hide your sins. Confess them and give them up, then God will show mercy to you.”
Proverbs 28:13 GNB

How Do I Take This Step?

1. Take a personal moral and spiritual inventory.

• Alone with a pen and paper, answering:
  • What have I felt guilty, regret or remorseful about?
  • What are the faults in my life that I know need changing?”
  • And you ask God to help you out.
• Lamentations 3:40 “Let us examine our ways and test them.”
• Psalm 139:23–24 “Search me O God, and know my heart. Test my thoughts, point out anything you find in me that makes you sad.”
• Why in writing?
  • Because it forces you to be specific.
  • Thoughts disentangle themselves when they pass through the lips and the fingertips.

2. Accept responsibility for my faults.

• Proverbs 20:27 “The spirit of a man is the lamp of the Lord, searching all the inner depths of his heart.”
  • Paraphrased = “The Lord gave us a mind and a conscious. We cannot hide from ourselves.”
• The greatest holdup to the healing for my hang-up is me.
• Don’t rationalize or minimize it.
  • If it’s no big deal how come you still remember it twenty years later?
• I John 1:8 “If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us.”
  • Phillips translation: “We live in a world of illusion.”
  • Living Bible: “We’re only fooling ourselves.”
• If I really want to stop defeating myself, I’ve got to stop deceiving myself.

3. Ask God for forgiveness.

• I John 1:9 “If we freely admit that we have sinned we find God utterly reliable. He forgives our sin and makes us thoroughly clean from all that is evil.”
• How not to get forgiveness from God:
  1. Don’t beg.
  2. Don’t bargain.
  3. Don’t bribe.
  4. You just believe.

4. Admit my faults to another person

• James 5:16 “Admit your faults to one another and pray for each other so that you may be healed.”
• Why do I need to drag another person into this?
  • Because the root of our problem is relational.
  • The secrets I hold onto are the secrets that make me sick.
  • God says, “Revealing your feelings is the beginning of healings.”
• John 3:14-15 “And as Moses lifted up the serpent in the wilderness, even so must the Son of Man be lifted up, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have eternal life.”

5. Accept God’s forgiveness and forgive myself.

• Romans 3:23–24 TLB “All of us have sinned … yet not God declares us not guilty if we trust in Jesus Christ, who freely takes away our sins.”
• How does God forgive?
  • God forgives instantly, freely, completely.
• Romans 8:1 “There is no condemnation for those who live in union with Christ Jesus”

“I have seen how they acted but I will heal them, I will lead them and help them and I will comfort those who mourn. I offer peace to all near and far.”
Isaiah 57:18

Road To Recovery - Letting Go

Luke 8:40-48
The Step of Faith

Principle #1 – Reality
Principle #2 – Hope
Principle #3 – Choice

The First Step to R.E.C.O.V.E.R.Y

• Principle 1 - Realize I'm NOT God!
• I admit that I am powerless to control my tendency to do the wrong thing and my life is unmanageable.
• Matthew 6:3 “Blessed are the poor in spirit, For theirs is the kingdom of heaven.”
  • "Happy are those who know they are spiritually poor"

The Second Step to R.E.C.O.V.E.R.Y

• Principle 2 – Earnestly believe that God exists, that I matter to him, and that he has the power to help me recover.
• Hebrews 11:6 “But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.”
• Matthew 5:4 “Happy are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted

The Third Step to R.E.C.O.V.E.R.Y

• Principle 3 – Consciously choose to commit all my life and will to Christ’s care and control.
• Matthew 11:28 “Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.”
• Matthew 5:5 “Happy are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.”

What keeps me from taking this step?

1. Pride

• Proverbs 18:12 “Before destruction the heart of a man is haughty, and before honor is humility”
  • “Arrogant people are on the way to ruin because they won’t admit it when they need help.”
• Proverbs 10:8 “The wise in heart will receive commands, But a prating fool will fall.”
  • “The self-sufficient fool falls flat on his face.”

2. Guilt

• Psalm 40:12-13 “For innumerable evils have surrounded me; My iniquities have overtaken me, so that I am not able to look up; They are more than the hairs of my head; Therefore my heart fails me. 13 Be pleased, O LORD, to deliver me; O LORD, make haste to help me!”
• “Problems, far too big for me to solve are piled higher than my head. Meanwhile, my sins, too many to count, have caught up with me and I’m ashamed to look up.”

3. Fear

• Proverbs 3:5-6 “Trust in the LORD with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; 6 In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths.”
• John 8:34-36 “Jesus answered them, “Most assuredly, I say to you, whoever commits sin is a slave of sin. 35And a slave does not abide in the house forever, but a son abides forever. Therefore if the Son makes you free, you shall be free indeed.”
• Matthew 16:26 “For what profit is it to a man if he gains the whole world, and loses his own soul? Or what will a man give in exchange for his soul?”

4. Worry

• The Christian life is a decision followed by a process.
  • Establish the beach head
• I Peter 5:6-7 “Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you.”
• II Timothy 1:12 “For this reason I also suffer these things; nevertheless I am not ashamed, for I know whom I have believed and am persuaded that He is able to keep what I have committed to Him until that Day.”
• Philippians 1:6 “God who began a good work in you, will keep right on helping you to grow in His grace until His task is finally completed.”

5. Doubt

• Luke 8:40-48
  • The Step of Faith
• “Help my unbelief”!

How Do I Take This Step?

• I accept God’s Son as my Savior.
• Romans 10:9-10 “… that if you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. For with the heart one believes unto righteousness, and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation”
• I accept God’s Word as my standard for living.
• II Timothy 3:16 “All Scripture is inspired by God and useful for teaching the faith and correcting error for resetting the direction of a man’s life, training him in good living.”
• I accept God’s will as my strategy, as my goal in life.
• Psalm 40:8 “I delight to do your will.”
• Matthew 6:33 “But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.”
• I accept God’s power as my strength.
• Philippians 4:13 “I can do everything God asks me with the help of Christ who gives me the strength and power.” No longer do I have to rely on my own energy. Things work better when they’re plugged in. You get plugged into God, you’re not so tired all the time. God says, “I will give you My power to be all I want you to be.”
• I accept God’s Son as my Savior.
• I accept God’s Word as my standard for living.
• I accept God’s will as my strategy, as my goal in life.
• I accept God’s power as my strength.

Road To Recovery - Where to get help when you hurt

Focusing on the Father
Luke 15:11-32

Principle #1 – Light
Principle #2 – Hope

I have seen how they acted but I will heal them, I will lead them and help them and I will comfort those who mourn. I offer peace to all near and far. Isaiah 57:18-19

God’s Great Promises
5 parts to recovery that God wants to do in your life.

1. If you have been hurt, God says “I want to heal you.”
2. If you’re confused, “I want to lead you.”
3. If you’ve ever felt you were helpless to change anything, “I want to help you change that.”
4. If you’ve ever felt no one understands your problem, “I want to comfort you.”
5. If you feel anxious and worried and afraid, “I want to offer peace to you.”

Breakthrough
So how do we break out?

The LORD has broken through my enemies before me, like a breakthrough of water.” Therefore he called the name of that place Baal Perazim. I Samuel 5:20

We must get past denial!
Genesis 3 – Shifting blame
Antidote = PAIN

Pain removes the veil; it plants the flag of truth within the fortress of a rebel soul.
-- C.S. Lewis The Problem of Pain

Denial Busters:
1. Crisis
2. Confrontation
3. Catastrophe

God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pains: it is His megaphone to rouse a deaf world.
-- C.S. Lewis The Problem of Pain

The First Step to R.E.C.O.V.E.R.Y

• Principle 1 - Realize I'm NOT God!
• I admit that I am powerless to control my tendency to do the wrong thing and my life is unmanageable.
• Matthew 6:3 “Blessed are the poor in spirit, For theirs is the kingdom of heaven.”
  • "Happy are those who know they are spiritually poor"

The Second Step to R.E.C.O.V.E.R.Y

• Principle 2 – Earnestly believe that God exists, that I matter to him, and that he has the power to help me recover.
• Hebrews 11:6 “But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.”
• Matthew 5:4 “Happy are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted

Three parts to taking step 2:

1. Acknowledge God’s existence.

• Romans 1:20 “Since the creation of the world, God’s invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen.”
• Psalm 19:1“The heavens declare the glory of God.”
• Psalm 14:1“The fool says “There is no God.””

2. Understand God’s character.

• Colossians 1:15 (Phillips) “Christ is the visible expression of the invisible God.”
  • God knows about my situation
  • God cares about my situation
  • God can change me and my situation

3. Accept God’s offer to help me.

• Philippians 2:13 (Phillips) “For God is at work within you giving you the will and the power to achieve His purpose.”
• II Timothy 1:7 (GNB) “The Spirit that God gives us … fills us with power, love and self-control.”

CCC Vision
At CCC our vision is stated in one word – Blessing!

It is the dream of a place once seen as cursed become a blessing!“
A place where the hurting and hopeless can find healing and the Living Hope. A place that is small in men's eyes used of God to touch the whole Kansas City metro area.
A safe place to grow and go!

How To Plug Into God’s Power:

• Believe & Receive
• Isaiah 43:2-3
• Isaiah 43:2–3 TLB “When you go through deep waters and great troubles, I will be with you, … you won’t drown! When you walk through the fires of oppression, you won’t be burned up.”
• Will power is not enough!
  • You need HIS WILL, HIS POWER!
  • Philippians 2:13 (Phillips) “For God is at work within you giving you the will and the power to achieve His purpose.”

I have seen how they acted but I will heal them, I will lead them and help them and I will comfort those who mourn. I offer peace to all near and far. Isaiah 57:18